Happy 13th Birthday, Mya!

Dearest sweet Mya, my teenage daughter, “I’m so glad we live in a world where there are Octobers”. I’ve so enjoyed putting together your Anne of Green Gables movie birthday party with Olivia, Aria and Jenna;  and watching Miss Congeniality (your first PG13 movie!) with you to celebrate. Thank you for sharing your birthday weekend with Matt and Diana’s visit even if you did not know them, and picking Daruma for your birthday dinner.

I’m ever so thankful to God that you’re ours, and we get the front row seat to watch how God is growing you. Your big and small questions about theology, politics and the world, love for your friends and youth group, desire to volunteer whether to the little cubbies or elderly or for the earth, willingness to pray, and deep empathy… I love the heart that He’s forming in you. I know that there will be some lessons that will just have to be learnt the hard way, and roads that you’ll have to travel for Him to get you there. It is my prayer that He’ll make you His and you’ll make Him yours, no matter what.

I know we put you through the ringer – being one of the very few in your circles for not having a phone, encouraging you audition for the school play only not to be cast, going to places and events where you’d rather not be at, wanting you to try something different every year (the Young Writer’s conference, what will the life of a wrestling manager be like?)… You’ve risen to every occasion, well almost. Dare to be different my dear girl, the world will want you to be like it, your heart that seeks approval will want to just fit in. But there’s too much at stake to just go with the flow. Stand on the firm foundation of Christ, stick to your convictions of what’s true and right; and fight for justice and love, then intentionally “become all things to all people, so that by all means we might save some… for the sake of the gospel” (1 Cor 9:22-23)

You’ve read more fiction books than I ever have and wrote many exciting essays (the suspense-filled fairy folk) that rolled the socks off your teachers. You’ve introduced me to new things that I otherwise would not have enjoyed. Whether it’s Jane Eyre or Persuasion, I love your thoughtful choice of heroines. Thank you for making me read your Anne books – though I average a miserly 1 a year, and re-experiencing Shakespeare! You also got me to know Corrie Ten Boom more with your “Hiding Place” book club. You’re the “girl-friend” that I get to do things with, whether it’s musicals like Les Miz or Hamilton, or concerts like Ellie & Drew Holcomb (with the fam) or Steven Curtis Chapman (with daddy), or fluffy rom-coms. I love your range for books, movies, songs, pop-culture, etc. Keep experiencing what literature, the arts and culture have to offer dear one, they’ll expand  your world and take you into worlds you otherwise would not have gone – even some painful, dark ones. But keep finding the light in them! I hope we finish “Till we have faces” this year!!

“I’m so glad I get to live in a world where there is my Mya Faith.” I love you so much, my precious daughter! We love you so very much, our teenage queen.

In the New York Subway

I was in the New York subway. Across from me, sat a man dressed in red. He started spewing profanities at the lady standing in front of him. He pushed her, and then she pushed him; and they started yelling at each other. At one point, she tried to get him off the train by holding it up; but nothing happened. Another passenger shouted at him to get off but to no avail. I looked at him, and at her, and all around, and then I looked down on my phone.

He did not seem unstable, but clearly not rationale either. He was playing video games on his phone, and was triggered the well dressed lady for some reason. He was not one to listen or be reasoned with, would me saying anything to him make a difference? Why yell at the gong to stop?

She stood her ground and did not back down. It would have been easier to walk away from the mad man. She probably felt betrayed by the train full of passengers, no one stood up for her, at least not soon enough. She stood alone. I wanted to say I’m sorry I did not stand up for her, or let her know that I was on her side. Would not engaging and changing cars be a sign of weakness and cowardice?

The witnesses heard them. But we were all by-standers. It was uncomfortable but we shrugged that off anyway. We understood why she held up the train – despite the inconvenience of delay; but we did nothing to get him off either. Were we weighing the cost of getting involved? Or playing things out in our head to what end? Did we not want to add fuel to the fire, or not care enough?

What I’d like to do when faced with this again, is to let her know she’s not alone, to at least plead with him to stop, and perhaps shine a little light amongst the silent crowd.