Homecoming

Back at home.. it’s of course nice to once again be in the arms of family and dearly loved friends. but the sentiments are mixed especially when you have half your heart elsewhere. :p haha yes, most unabashedly with my significant Ar-ther in Beijing. just a couple of random thoughts on being home so far…

believe it or not- there are changes to this garden city. not huge ones, but changes nonetheless. tweaks to the familiar shopping hangouts, surprises round the corners, new roads, new tunnels. cannot wait to visit these places and know this island at the back of my hand again. but of course the beauty of nostalgia rises in you as you pass by familiar spots. and my favorite activity of “contemplating the city” takes on a new dimension as I wait to share it with a loved one.

pastor zhang spoke on “fishing the Chinese-speaking Singaporeans” yesterday. I want to say as much as I totally agree with all that he said, I want to say that we’re not “picking up leftovers”- as in not that we’re doing a ministry that no one (i.e. the “English speaking church”) wants to do… coming back from Beijing, I honestly honestly believe that we’re “at the forefront” of this generation. Singaporeans today, driven by the Chinese economy, WANTS to speak Chinese. being fluent in mandarin is no longer perceived as a “cheena-passe” thing. it’s the “way to go”! We’ll be a church that sends His bilingual army into the land of bountiful harvests!! This warrants more discussion, maybe another entry on it another time.

the LDR (long-distance relationship) is a lot more emotional than I expected it to be. I will not say harder because it is not daunting nor am I fearful of the prospects. But this drama queen spent two nights bawling- and my sister cries “please save the trees” hahaahah…. I never expected to cry this hard from missing someone. And just on day one, this neurotic insecure wreck actually started to wonder if she should be a burden to her man. Day ONE… I know.. MAD and CRUEL… So I put this here so that if I ever ever fall into those moods ever, those around me can remind me that, even I think that THAT is insane and it is NOT something I want, ever. And also, just a public apology for being so BRUTAL to my loved one. *sorry hons, please forgive me :p*

even though I say half of my heart is with my man in another land, but don misunderstand me. I am excited excited excited and know know know that this season apart will be fruitful fruitful fruitful. Not only for us individually, our ministries but also for our relationship. so hey you at home, don ever think you only have half of me! I am here 100% doing my little bit for His Kingdom, so will he! to quote him- we Christians are pretty adept in living in two realities: for the present and now coz that is where I am, and also for the future and fulfillment of something better :)

I have not forgotten the questions on my future, the lessons of faith and my heart’s desires. But all too easily, the “must-do”s and “do-first”s may sweep me to settle. so I pray that my heart will be still before my Lord, my eyes will be open to see His plan unfold, my ears will be sensitive to hear Him speak, my hands and feet be willing to follow… His will be done...