Tuesday, June 05, 2012

Hot Potatoes (II) - Female Pastor

Things used to be a lot clearer it seems. As I think about the issue of a female pastor who teaches and preaches, I am in want to understand better the theology behind so many facets of the church life! I probably should read “Four Views of Women in Ministry” first, study the relevant Bible passages and write a paper on it to consolidate my thoughts. But here I am, thinking out loud once again.

Recounting the background of my journey thus far on this issue would be a good place to start.

PPC (my home church) had 3 female pastors on staff when I first attended. Two of them (Pastor Lau and Lijuan) are very faithful and skilled teachers of the Word, and wise counselors; while one of them is in charge of the choir. For the record, PPC has female elders too.
As a young Christian, I did not give a second thought about their presence on the pastoral staff- and neither was I aware of the controversy behind it all. But what is certain is that I had not once thought to myself that “I was being taught by a woman”. All I heard was the faithful teaching of God’s Word from the pulpit or the wise counsel from my beloved sisters. They were but vessels, and the Holy Spirit was the real teacher.

Then I started to grow deeper into the Word during my college days through Project Timothy conferences, one-on-one Bible studies with Chew Chern and Friday night services at ARPC. They opened my eyes to what the Bible says in 1Tim 2:12, and I was really convicted about women not having authority over men in church. “Oh dear! My church is sinning against God!”
Being a cell group leader then, I was convicted that I should not be teaching God’s Word to the other brothers or be seen as their “leader” either. So I tried to step down as the leader, and passed on the baton to a younger brother and arranged for the brothers to take turn leading the Bible Study. For some of them, their hearts and gifts were elsewhere, and it was evident from the teaching. And then I offered to prepare the Bible Study for them so that they could deliver it. (Who would be seen as the teacher be in this case? The one who prepared or the one who delivered?)
I then tried to speak to Lai Kein about it during a casual conversation. She challenged me to look into the passage more, and consider the cultural effects of it. Aha! I knew that was the easy way out, and was prepared with the answer I was taught “but Paul uses Adam and Eve as his justification. This has to do with God’s creational design, and not just culture!” That feeble attempt to interact with my church leaders on this led to nowhere. I was so disturbed that I contemplated leaving the church. I went church hunting, and was really close to leaving. But God never gave me the green light by knitting my heart so close to this community. So I stayed.

The female pastoral issue being a non-issue in church, and being convicted of playing my part in God’s household, I started serving and teaching actively again. I morphed my Bible Study style to be more discussion-based so that the people were led to find the truth themselves, and I was not directly “teaching” them. I tried to defer to male authority or decisions where possible (even decisions on lunch locations!), so that I was not “exercising authority” over them. I am pretty sure they never saw or felt it that way!

I lamented the absence of male commitment to God’s church- that they were too distracted by the things of the world. And I kept trying to encourage male leadership as much as possible. I tried persuading them to serve. When that failed, I tried to walk away and leave things in shambles for a while, to show them that they were needed. That did not work very well either. But over time, God changed my heart.
He gave me a heart and passion for this flock, and the gifts to serve them. Why do I keep walking away from it, and trying to push others into a position that they have no desire for? And He asked me if I ever thought myself of higher, better and more able than my brothers? Did I ever think about using my position as a leader to exercise authority over them? My answer was a clear no. At least never overtly. But whether I have whined and pleaded and played the female card to “make them comply?” Guilty as charged. :p
While I had to (and have to still... esp towards Arthur at least :p) repent of the latter, I felt free now to serve. I am a servant-leader, I serve them first, and the Holy Spirit will lead them closer to God by His grace. I am but a sheep-dog, pointing them to our Chief Shepherd. I love my brothers (and sisters), and desire for them to walk closer to God- and I will play whatever role I can to encourage that!

And then Pastor Lau became the senior pastor of PPC when Pastor Chen retired. Oh my! That’s another wrinkle thrown into the whole female-pastor thing. Till then, I could still reason that a male pastor was the head of PPC, so all the pastors fell under that “male cover”. It forced me to think even harder what my stance was.
“Ok, the elders board was predominantly male. As a Presbyterian, they were the “real ones in charge”. That could work. But.. Hmm.. no, that will not really cut it. Pastor Lau was still the more visible spiritual leader.
But when I looked at the other pastors, there was no question that she was the most suitable candidate to take over that role. There was a little too much male ego in the other pastors, and they were not ready. If it is true that one would rather be ruled by a wise Turk than a foolish Christian, then I would rather be led by a wise female than a foolish male!

So Pastor Lau took up the mantle to serve in that capacity (knowing clearly that it’s not her strongest gift), and she did in a most beautiful and God-glorifying manner. Being the senior pastor of 4 church locations was no easy feat. She had the full support and respect of the elders, but she never once portrayed as if she was exercising authority over them or anyone. Instead, I saw a humble servant who led by her model, example and life. Five years later, the church in a more stable and stronger place, and she was convicted to step down to serve in the areas where God has gifted her more strongly to do so. Her humility and obedience shone through. She was but God’s servant, and want no more than to do His will. She is no power monger!

Here I am, with so many female models in my life who showed how to lead and teach, without being an overt disrespectful female who exercised authority over men. In fact, their examples have led me to be even more willing to be submissive and step aside for male leadership. It has made me most annoyed with the “Alpha females” in the States who kept having to “prove that they can do it!”. They want to teach, they want to lead… I was bewildered and annoyed at my own sex! But that I learnt is the outcome of the oppression and negative voices they have faced all these years.- this is a separate story.

If a woman wants to teach and lead to exercise authority over man, I think that’s a problem. If a man is too proud to learn from a woman, I think that’s a problem. We are called to mutually submit to one another. It is the heart, attitude and intention that matters. And God works through whoever He wants to teach His Church.

I do have the preference for male leadership- I will admit. It is good and beautiful for God’s household to reflect His creational design. BUT should that deprive from women teaching and encouraging altogether? NO! God did not made us to be dumb vessels, but helpers! And we are most equipped to help the church- God has given us wisdom and talents, to speak to one another in psalms and encourage each other, and sometimes to teach.
For the man to tell the woman to “be silent!” or for the woman who wants to talk loudly over the man, both have to repent before God.

I must admit something must be lacking in my theology. I do not understand how some churches can allow women to teach in Sunday school, or small groups or do counseling; and not during the service. If “no teaching by women” is allowed, then it should be true for all platforms! Is the pulpit more sacred than the other sessions? God is in them all, and is glorified through them all! How does the authority level differ- other than the number of people that attends?

As Arthur said, the woman’s (anyone’s in fact) teaching would be most scrutinized on Sunday morning! So it is less likely for her to teach false or weak doctrine. She is most clearly under the “authority” of God and His Word, the Church, the elders at that time! But in the casual conversation where she is counseling another- a man or woman, who is there to check what she is saying? Who sees her “authority cover” other than that the other person?
I always see the Holy Spirit as the true Teacher behind the vessel, and so the form that the vessel takes does not matter as long as he/she is faithful and sits under the authority of the Word?
And if Christ is the Head of the Church, we all are following Him and not the pastor in church. Does the form of the pastor- male/ female matter? He/she ought not to lead if he/she is not walking with God, and not because of the gender!

Sorry to be rambling for so long. The above is a sharing more from my experience and opinion, more than from God’s Word. But I believe that He works in them all, and He is still teaching and shaping me. I still stand to be corrected.
I’ve gotta ask Paul when I see him in heaven in the future- what exactly did he mean in his letter to Timothy? Was he addressing a specific situation in the church then, or not? He sure left the church in confusion- though I am sure that his epistle had helped many as well.

1 comment:

Grace said...

Hi babes, thanks for helping me think through the issue of women leadership in the church. I'm currently reading this fantastic book by Claire Smith called "God's good design", published by Matthias Media. In it, she looks at all the key passages in the Bible that speak of men and women roles, and she does an excellent job of explaining each passage. Go read it and tell me what you think!