Going on Thirty

So I've hit the Big 3; and I'm late for this blog post by 14 days. Sorry! Been a little too busy- with starting in my new job, keeping up with school work, the many monthly ministry commitments, and all the ad-hoc fun stuff we are "obligated" to do. This is pretty much the story of my life these days. But it's good that this old friend keeps me in check; and stealing some time to do this, is important and good and very much needed.
 
I am amazed at what God can do in thirty years. I am still a very messy lump of clay no doubt, but I'm thankful the Potter is still keeping me in His hands and all that He has done in moulding me till this very day. From an infant who needs to be fed and taken care of, to a rebellious child who has done much wrong, to a teenage girl with poor self-identity, to a young woman whom God sought despite her sin and ignorance, to a thirty-year-old who knows who she is today in Christ, and excited to see what God will do in her every tomorrow.

So who am I at thirty?
1. Feeling fairly comfortable with myself, my self-awareness, my coping mechanisms, my looks and my imperfections. I still have insecurities and questions about all these things, but at least I don't second guess myself for too long or too much any more- usually.
2. Feeling like I am at the prime of my life, that there is so much more I can offer to this world which has so many needs. And I'm still trying to find what it is. The tension between practical comforts and spiritual fulfillment; between being grounded and a naive dreamer- the time will come when it will all come together. I have faith. One day. Some day.
3. Feeling very loved, blessed and affirmed. All the above would not have been possible if God had not given me every single person I have, and ever had in my life.. especially the man who loves me and believes in me more than I believe in myself; and the sister who knows me and is always there for me.
4. Looking forward to growing old- because I am learning that there is no short-cut to wisdom. I love every step He's led me; and I know i still have a long way to go. There is so much to learn in the school of life. I pray He'll lead me to places, and open my eyes to the way He wants my heart to break for the broken-ness He sees.
5. Looking forward to the joys of parenting some time in the few years- God willing; but also knowing that I will never stop feeling like the little girl who is trying to learn to do what she's doing.

So here's where I am today... Thank you for being interested in me enough to read this- it means a lot that you are in my life. I thank God for you, and I love you!