The craziest of which is that someone
stepped in front of my train on Tuesday. Yup, the train I was riding on killed
someone, and choosing to be hit by a train wasn’t something that just happened
on TV.
I did not ask “why?” when Robin Williams
committed suicide, maybe because the media tried to explain it with his
depression and drug abuse history. But when death hits so close to home, the
desire to “justify” the death begged the why question. “Why did he do that? What
could be so bad that he would choose to end his life? Like that? Why?” There
was not a reason I could find adequate.
But the craziest thing about this crazy
incident, was that even with a man smashed under the train, people just went on
their way, myself included. People were concerned about getting home, and the
metra was concerned about the delay. I lingered until Arthur and Mya picked me
up, and felt apologetic about the inconvenience I caused. Surely all these
responses are inappropriate. But what was one supposed to do? How was one
supposed to respond? Not as if there is anything one could do really, between
the police and firemen. but someone just died, ok? Surely, life ought to stop a
little bit no?
It was awkward. I guess death is awkward.
Maybe that’s why people looked at the crosses and went away on Calvary that day.
A certain piece-of-work in the office was
the bane of my existence this week.
Firstly, she called for a meeting and did
not attend. People prepared slides to answer the questions she had and stayed back late to explain to her, and she should have the decency to at least show up right?And then, she asked for a long meeting with no clear direction and insinuated that I was ill-prepared.
“What is the agenda?” she asked.
“I have no specific agenda. You asked to meet to lay everything on the board a few weeks ago”.
“Meetings without agenda are not effective. If you are not prepared, let’s wait until you are ready”.
Hello? You were the one who wanted to meet, not me. Why and what should I prepare?
And then the very next day, she did not
like how I labeled a presentation – with the very term that her team had been
using the whole year. There is no doing right by her and her minions.
I need to keep telling myself to breathe
and that they are not worth it. Seriously. In light of eternity, you and your
quality will be burnt into chaff lady.
The frustrating situation at work brought Arthur and me to dream about the day when i can stop working again. Maybe it's not a dream, maybe it's called faith, and He showed me a bushful of sparrows right at that moment. We are worth more than many sparrows, aren't we Father? Fear not, worry not, my heart. Leap, when that day comes!
Horray! The LIFE Group
engine is up and running! The gathering of the saints in fellowship is such an
encouragement. I can’t wait till the group meets again in 2 weeks! Thank you
God for the space to stop and encourage one another. It is that cup of cool water in midst of a week that's been fraught with craze.
And the daily high of spending just a few short hours with Mya and Arthur. That makes everything all right and worthwhile. Their faces are just what i need to remember what is truly important in the end.
No comments:
Post a Comment